Argh! Before I realized it, it's been a long while since I last posted. I have some photos all processed and ready to go into the blog, so I'll need to write a post about what I've been up to lately! You'll have to wait a little while longer though, since I'm at work and don't have access to said photos. I also really want to update the look of this blog, to freshen it up a bit. :)
Todd and I went running at Miramar Lake yesterday morning. I decided to run for longer, so I went for 4 miles! Towards the end, this lady asked me to run with her to help push her until the end, because she was pooped out. So I did. This lady used to be an elite marathoner who ran 7:30 miles. Well, 15 years later and 30 lbs heavier, she was a lot slower. But I totally admire for her for keeping on!
While listening to my iPod, I was totally struck by a song by Bon Jovi. It seemed like I'd never heard it before, but I probably have since I have the album! It spoke to me in a brand-new way. I really believe that sometimes the Lord speaks to me when I put my iPod on shuffle. Like last year when He comforted me after my mother's death with Steven Curtis Chapman's "With Hope".
So yesterday I was moved by Bon Jovi's "Welcome To Wherever You Are". I just felt like God was saying, "it's okay that you've neglected me for a while. Just come back. I welcome you wherever you are."
Welcome to Wherever You Are by Bon Jovi, from the album Have a Nice Day.
Maybe we're different, but we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden, running through our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You come between just who you are and who you wanna be
If you feel alone, and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning, is some beginning's end
[Chorus]
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you gotta believe
That right here right now, you're exactly where you're supposed to be
Welcome, to wherever you are
When everybody's in, and you're left out
And you feel your drowning, in a shadow of a doubt
Everyones a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself, not what other people say
When it seems you're lost, alone and feeling down
Remember everybody's different
Just take a look around
[Chorus]
Be who you want to, be who you are
Everyones a hero, everyones a star
When you wanna give up, and your hearts about to break
Remember that you're perfect, God makes no mistakes
[Chorus]
Here's my iPod playlist that randomly came up during my run:
For the first time in over 2 weeks, I feel normal. And that's a good thing.
Since mid-April, I'd been gradually weaning off the medication that I'd been taking for a year for panic attacks and anxiety. I hadn't had a panic attack since last May, so I told my doctor that I think it's time to wean off. He told me to take 1/4 of a pill for a month, then none. (I had been taking 1/2 pills.) So around Memorial Weekend I stopped taking the pills.
Well, I'm in the 10% of people who suffered severe withdrawal symptoms. I've had a tension/migraine like headache for over 2 weeks. And dizziness and nausea. Here's a list of the symptoms I've had to endure.
-some insomnia
-extraordinarily vivid dreams
-memory & concentration problems
-an unconventional dizziness/vertigo
-the feeling of shocks, similar to mild electric one, running the length of my body
-head zaps
-headaches
-profuse sweating, esp. at night
-breaking out in tears
-hypersensitivity to motion & sound
-nausea, vomiting
-abdominal cramping
-chills / hot flashes
-tingling sensation in lower cheeks
-sore eyes
-fatigue
-grinding of teeth
-speech problems / inability to find the right word
-heartburn/gastric reflux
-muscle aches
These are all documented withdrawal symptoms that I have. There are quite a few others that I didn't have. It's hard for me to imagine why this drug was approved by the FDA if going off of it is this difficult. It's literally disrupted over two weeks of my life. But FINALLY, I think I've turned the corner and I'm ready to face the world again. I woke up this morning without a headache for the first time in over two weeks. You probably have no idea how excited I am at this development. It has felt like hell.
We had a really good weekend spending time doing what we love best, with each other and with good friends. ::smile::
The weather wasn't the best for San Diego. It was overcast and cloudy, and actually kind of cold, with highs in the low 60's. But we can't complain as we have year-round great weather, so this little glitch was alright with us.
I had cake for breakfast this morning! So bad I know, but it was sitting there on the counter calling my name. Our next door neighbor Annie made it and brought it over for our get-together lunch yesterday. It's chocolate with light chocolate frosting and caramel sauce. Inside has cherries. Yum! Sally came over yesterday too, and it was so great to see her. I hadn't seen her in almost a month it seems.
Dad finally made it home from Europe on Saturday. He went to France and various cities in Italy, plus Monaco. I'm going to visit him this weekend and check out his photos.
I did get a chance to work out some this weekend. I walked a lot. I got to go to the beach and take a walk on Saturday, plus have Bongiornos pizza!
I watched Grey's Anatomy. I am a couple of episodes from the season finale.
I also watched Juno. What a great movie! I cried and cried, although I think I might have been extra-emotional due to the fact that I am off my medication that I've been on for a year, after my panic attacks. I'm still getting used to being off the meds. It does seem like I feel the highs and lows a little more, but we'll see.
It's back to work Tuesday today. I've got stuff to do for work, plus some bills to pay.
It is Memorial Weekend and the Sweet Shoppe Designs blog wants to know what one of my favorite red, white, or blue kit is. I took a lookie around and found this one by Micheline Martin:
It's cute and red, white and blue!
If you haven't seen this HUGE collaboration between some super-awesome designers at Songbird Avenue, you NEED to go take a look!
This past week I've eaten so many good things! And I did exercise a couple of times too...
Let's see... Tuesday night I took Todd to Cafe Japengo in La Jolla. I had a free $100 Night On The Town allowance from work, because of something extra I did a while back. I got the seared scallops and potato cakes with lemongrass beurre blanc. Todd got the Kobe Flat Iron Steak with wasabi mashed potatoes, bok choy, and hon shemiji mushrooms with ginger-port reduction. Both were yummy and full of flavor. Oh, I also had a crab cake appetizer. Todd doesn't eat crab so I got it for myself! :) Then for dessert I had the chocolate lava cake with vanilla gelato and fresh fruit, while Todd had cinnamon dusted tempura banana with caramel sauce and ganache with vanilla gelato. Todd wolfed it down so fast and said it was one of the best desserts he'd ever had!
Then Wednesday night after dinner, after I cleaned up the dishes, Todd said I could go to Yogurt World. Who am I to turn down Yogurt World, so off we went. I just love their original tart flavor with sliced almonds and little white choco chips. So good!
Thursday evening we went running at Miramar Lake. Afterwards we went to Chile Peppers for our favorite Mexican food. I had 3 rolled chicken tacos and scarfed them down really fast. Then I got another three because I was still hungry. But I gave Todd one so I wasn't SUPER piggy, just slightly piggy.
Yesterday we went running at the beach in Encinitas. It was hot already at 10 AM. So we put our time in, then went over to Bongiornos nearby and had our favorite pizza. That pizza is soooo good. Then about 5:00 PM we drove down to Bread & Cie so Todd could get his favorite brownie. He claimed that it's his "birthday brownies", even though his birthday was back in Feb. But his sister Amy had bought the brownies for him and they never delivered them, so I guess they're still his birthday brownies.
