Sunday, August 2, 2015

Thoughts on Sharing

At the end of 2014 I quietly stopped sharing most of my personal life on this blog.  It was definitely a conscious decision on my part.  Sharing my life so publicly on my blog and on other social media has become a squeamish and undesirable thing for me.  There were several reasons I felt this way. 

I am now a middle-aged woman.  I like living my life joyfully but mostly anonymously.  I started to feel like sharing on my blog and on social media actually took away from some personal experiences that I want to savor for myself.  I like enjoying the experiences with family and friends with just those people and not plaster them on the internet for strangers to look upon.  I felt like people commenting on my experiences took away from them, rather than added to them.  This is a very personal thing that has changed for me.  I did not feel this way when I first started blogging 10 years ago.  But in the last year I’ve definitely felt this way, so I wanted to test the waters of NOT sharing for myself to see how it feels.  So far I like it.

What a lot of people don’t understand about online sharing and blogging is:  You are only seeing a SNIPPET of someone’s life, not their full life at all.  People think that just because I shared a lot about eating out that I eat out all the time, when that couldn’t be further from the truth.  We cook at least five dinners every week at home.  I don’t scrapbook every dinner I make at home, because it’s just not that interesting.  It’s mundane most of the time.  But I used to blog about eating out a lot, because those were special occasions to me.  People drew the wrong conclusions.  That was just one example.

One downside of sharing so much less of my life on this blog in 2015 is I sort of miss the connection with people.  For some reason people do connect with me when I share about my personal life, even if they don’t see the rest of my life and sometimes draw the wrong conclusions.  I’ve made some good online and even real life friends through this blog.  I’m somewhat wistful that this is less likely to happen now.  But really, many of my favorite bloggers have stopped blogging.  I can see that blogging is becoming less and less of a thing now, and I am a part of it too, without planning to be. 

You are probably wondering, hmm, what about the memory-keeping aspect of your blog?  You used to say that most of your memories are kept on the blog, and only a few of them get scrapped, and that’s ok with you.  The answer is, I have been blogging my personal posts on a private blog this year, where only Todd and I can post and see the blog posts.  My life is still documented and I very much enjoy looking at my personal posts about the fun things I’ve done this year.  There’s actually been around 70 posts on my private blog that I started at the beginning of 2015.  When I scrapbook I still reference those posts and sometimes copy and paste the journaling.  I still love blogging as a form of memory-keeping.  Just not publicly.

It is the beginning of August now.  I don’t know how I’ll feel about blogging personal life blog posts here at listgirl.com going forward.  I sort of enjoy my setup for now.  However, while blogging some personal posts at my private blog this weekend, I came upon some fun experiences that I may share on this blog selectively, from time to time.  We shall see.

20 comments:

  1. Hi Christine! It's been awhile since we've connected. Thank you for sharing this post. I know I have personally not spent as much time in the blogging world and I know some of that it due to my life season right now, but also because I was on Facebook/Instagram. I feel like social media has sort of downgraded true communication. I am proud of you for being more private about your private life--and I really like what you said about how it needs to stay special to you. I have noticed that about myself as well. By the way, I LOVE your scrapbook pages! You are one of my favorite scrapbookers!

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    1. Thank you so much for your comment, Christina. I think what I feel is not uncommon. It doesn't stem from a mean spirit of not sharing. It stems from a desire to have experiences that are genuine and your own, unmarred by what other people think of them.

      I do intended to keep sharing my scrapbooking and crafty posts. And thank you so much for your encouragement now and in the past!

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  2. Hey! Totally get your post. My blogging came to almost a complete halt when I had more and more pre-teens / teens in the house. They don't take kindly to mom sharing all their stuff...and really, what else do I do in this season? So, the blogging waned. You know how much I love following your adventures on other social media platforms. Hugs from the east coast..where the summer temps are high and the humidity is atrocious! :)

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    1. Thanks Tracey! Yes, I feel more free to share on Facebook occasionally, because I don't accept friend requests unless I actually know the person. Even then, I've got my FB locked down on privacy and I don't share everything. When it is a public social media such as my Twitter and IG, I definitely am very selective about what I share.

      Navigating the social media, blog, and sharing vs not-sharing is sometimes exhausting these days, LOL. I often wonder about kids who grew up in this era where they practically live on social media, what effect this has on their lives.

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    2. I can tell you the teens I know aren't all that 'into' sharing everything about themselves. They also aren't into knowing everything about everyone else, either! It's going to be interesting to watch them navigate the land of social media as they enter their 20's.

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  3. Hi Christine! One has to do what is most comfortable and right for themselves. I enjoy whatever you do share on your listgirl blog but totally understand about privacy.

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    1. Thanks June! Thanks for continuing to stop by!

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  4. I understand your sentiments. Thank you for being so honest. I'm glad that you've found a private way to continue documenting your private moments with Todd. I do hope to see your amazing scrap layouts on your blog or IG. Love your creativity and style.

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  5. I agree with June K, you should do what makes you feel good. I love all you write in your blog, and I love hearing from you, when in the past you decided to stop blogging I was really really sad. If you have found the way to blog that suits you, I'm happy because I know you will not go away ;)
    You are, after all, one of my favorite scrappers, and you inspired me to start PL! <3

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    1. Thank you, Mikadavi! A lot of blogging actually feels very alone. It's always great to get feedback when you make a small impact on someone. I always appreciate it!

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  6. I totally get where you're coming from. You have to do what's right for you! I am squeamish about sharing publicly, too. I have to admit, I've always loved seeing your posts about life and travel in California / Hawaii. Your creative scrapping pages are always fun to see, also. But it's totally something I can relate to -- the desire for privacy. Interesting post!

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  7. i feel the exact same way. I have trouble uploading most of my layouts, especially my PL ones because they are personal. I get it.

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  8. I've been feeling a lot of the same things which is interesting because I think we are close to the same age. I've shared so much publicly over my almost 10 years of blogging, and I'm feeling more nervous about that now. Maybe because my kids are adults and I worry about broadcasting what they are doing? I also am wanting more privacy. But I still long for those connections as well. I also miss your travel adventures because they helped us when we went to San Diego and Hawaii, but I totally respect why you aren't blogging about those anymore.

    Glad we have been able to connect through blogs, podcasts, and even in real life!

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    1. Hi Katie! Yes, I feel like what we're feeling about blogging personal things is not uncommon and we're not alone. I am also glad that we connected and continue to connect on FB!

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  9. I can definitely relate, even though our lives are quite different in some aspects. I have cut back on sharing personal stuff, as my blog got a larger readership. I started getting hits and random followers on my various social media, especially G+ for some reason. Now why would young men in their twenties, as they appear in their photos, be interested in what I'm doing?! Anyway, I got a little hesitant to share as many photos and stories. Which is a shame, because I think it's the personal bits that get readers invested in a bloggers story. You know what I mean? Anyway, I always enjoy the food posts :) but I don't think you eat out every day :) For me, restaurant food is always more exciting than my home cooked food, because how many Taco Tuesday pics can I share. That followed by a steady rotation of spaghetti and the hot dogs (not in the same meal) that my kids seem to want to eat every week wouldn't make for exciting blogging. I also have moved a lot of my blogging onto a private blog, because then I don't even bother adding photos but I do record my journaling for future potential scrappy projects right away when the memories are fresh. I will miss your posts showing up in my feed if you cut back even further, but I do always enjoy living sort of vicariously through you on Instagram :) I sometimes imagine my life might have been more similar to yours had my husband and I moved to SoCal instead of back to MI, and it's always fun to see somewhat familiar places now that we aren't in SanFran anymore.

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  11. Christine, I love your projects and miss the wonderful food you shared. I wish I could wring the person's neck who said that you only eat out!! I'm a bit older than you and my children already left home. I cook nearly every day - wonderful food. The problem is: if I've cooked, we eat before I take pictures. If you eat out, you can sit back, relax and have time for a drink and some picture taking. The best story from your blog is the one of how you found Noodle. Please don't "ban" him to your private blog as well. Whatever you share, I will keep reading but I wouldn't like to have my personal info all over the interwebs as well. I do understand your decision.

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  12. I was wondering where you've been! I love reading your blog and your experiences! I take from some of your blog post especially the places you've eaten! We live in same city and you guys seem to find the best spots to eat at! You are my enabler when it comes to crafty stuff, you are my inspiration on getting my layouts or PL done! I do hope you continue to blog and totally understand not wanting to blog about personal stuff because I too feel the same way. I have a personal blog that I made private but use to share it. I would love to make my current blog a blog about crafting, food places and traveling. BUT I've struggled with exposing my personal life again and leaving it open to some ppl that seem to be unhappy in their lives and make rude comments about mine. Like you said, I don't post about every single detail of my life and the ones I do post about are things that I feel could benefit someone else, like travel tips. Anyhow, I hope you continue to blog from time to time as your life and time permits. I love getting to know you. I guess we should actually meet up for some yummy grub one day like how we use to before all this technology came about! Have a great week!

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  13. I honestly prefer more generic posts (as in, posts about projects created or meals prepared, etc) over personal posts. Maybe that's why I've been reading your blog for the past year! :D

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